It’s a little ragged and dirty, smells a little sweaty and like cheap pot. It wants to be a Richard Linklater movie, like maybe Slacker or Boyhood, full of little things that sneakily add up to more. The problem is, the tiny moments are just tiny, out of context.
Lords of Chaos is the largely true story of dumb-ass Norwegian metalheads who let their unfocused anger get away from them.
In light of the sheer volume of dog movies Isle of Dogs is not great, not like Old Yeller or Homeward Bound. It’s not shit either, like the schmaltzy Air Bud movies that just exploit dog lovers. Still, it covers the same ground of good companions who would do anything for their masters.
The great news is that Incredibles 2 mostly looks great. The animation is top notch and the action sequences are more imaginative, crisp, and followable than the cluttered, noisy crap in the live action movies.
There are some bright moments in the movie, many coming from Max and Annie’s next door neighbor, a deeply unsettled and lonely cop (Jesse Plemons) who sure would like to be included in game nights. But the best bits come early, before the story becomes as twisted up as a Doberman’s intestines.
Black Panther is really fucking boring and self-serious. I haven’t heard this many Goddamn self-righteous speeches since the City Council meeting where they voted to close the last video store in town that carried pornos.
I don’t regret seeing BlacKkKlansman, despite the title’s stupid-ass spelling of the title–seriously, it feels like something a board room full of old men would think sounded cool and urban.
It is the comic book equivalent of 24 hours of porn. One big fight is great. Two is okay. But by the 40th time some dude in armor shoots lasers out of his hands, the joy is long gone and you’re just praying the whole fucking thing will end.
It took five minutes for me to realize A Simple Favor isn’t meant for me. I’m sure it has its purpose, as does the Chilton repair manual for a 1988 Geo Metro. But I have no fucking clue how to use either. No matter how many times I’ve dreamed of owning a Metro, I could…
The plot is sort of like a truck full of tube socks. Nobody gives a shit whether it makes it to the destination except the people selling them.
