Two Injured in Holiday Patio Mishap
Local News - Newsmakers
Written by Helen Hamilton   
Friday, 03 July 2015 21:14

MILLBANK – Fireworks are not the only thing making a big bang in Millbank over the Independence Day weekend. On Friday night, patrons of Adolf’s Irish Pub gathered to celebrate and indulge in holiday drink specials, only to have the patio roof topple upon them. Lorne Pfeffernus, regular customer, and Adolf Mc’O’Patrick, owner/ manager, suffered slight lacerations to their scalps but are otherwise fine.

“I got the hell out of there when I saw the roof swaying back and forth”, says Barbie Berman, 47. “At first, I thought it was just me weaving, but then I noticed that my Mai Tai was staying in one spot, my friend Chelsea was staying in one spot, the only thing that was moving was the roof.”

“The patio has been up for a year now, and we’ve never had any problems with it,” says Mr. Mc’O’Patrick. It’s a good thing the patio roof was made out of balsa – safety first for my patrons, believe me. I think we might have had an earthquake, that’s the only explanation I could think of. ” party patio

Local geologist, Dr. Wendell Perry, noted that there were no irregular readings on the equipment located in the Disaster Lab at Tri-City Community College on Friday night.

The injuries were minor, but the trauma was still significant according to local residents. “They wouldn’t let me bring my Singapore Sling into the emergency room,” recalled Mr. Pfeffernus. “Even though I tried to explain that it was practically medicine. Look, it even has a medical name! Sling!”

But this longtime Millbank watering hole will not remain down for long. “Adolf’s Irish Pub will rebuild its Party Patio,” declared Mr. Mc’O’Patrick. “Millbank needs a spot to let its hair down and have a good time. And this time, we will use metal hardware! State of the art for maximum partying, that’s our motto.”

“Well, my friend Chelsea and I went to the Out of Bounds after the roof fell at Adolf’s and no roof fell on us there,” Ms. Berman said. “They should totally put that in their advertisements.”

The owner of the Out of Bounds, Gabriel Jesus Gandhi, could not be reached for comment on whether the lack of falling roofs would feature in their next marketing campaign.

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Last Updated on Friday, 03 July 2015 21:20

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